I've always been fascinated by personal development. The idea that you can control your destiny by selecting the right habits and following through is compelling. The world isn't fair, but personal development provides a reassuring illusion of control.

The most potent manifestation of this is New Year's resolutions. But serious people don't wait for New Year's—they start early. Research from the University College London says it takes 66 days on average to form a habit. If you want to start the year with your new habit already established, theoretically you should begin on October 27th. That gives you 66 days to lock it in before January 1st.

The Great Lock-In takes this further. This trend says start at back-to-school time—September 1st. Get four months of reps in, so by January 1st, the train already has momentum. I fucking love this! Instead of getting 66 days of practice, you get 120 days. If you can actually maintain your habit for 120 days, you'll make significant progress.

All this runway allows for human error. You can mess up and restart without the crushing pressure of a "perfect January." Most people cave under that pressure.

When I wanted to get back in shape at the end of 2022, I did my own mini lock-in. I committed to Orange Theory three times per week throughout December. This way, when January rolled around, I already had a routine. The approach worked well for me. I missed days, but perfection wasn't the point. The point was to get ready for 2023—to start my fitness journey strong.

I went to 10 of the 13 classes I'd planned that December. The previous month, I'd gone to 4 classes. In October, 6 classes. September, 7. But in January 2023? I hit 13 classes. This approach worked. It started the journey to my first half marathon in September 2023 and my first full marathon in September 2024.

Internet trends tend to be cringe, and the pressure to develop perfect habits is exhausting. But the Great Lock-In is a sound approach because it's gradual and allows room for error.

Who could you be in 2026 if you started working on it now?

People have no idea how dope BIPOC gay culture is. Why? Because whiteness dominates the gay mainstream. I am bored of discussing white gay men and their racism. I know for a fact, white gay men are sick of me too haha. We all have better things to do. Let's leave the white gays to their exclusive club and get back to BIPOC gay culture. First, some context.

Troye Sivan, the god of twinks himself, is one of my favorite queer singers. Recently Mr. Sivan released a new single and video promoting his upcoming third album. I love Troye's voice. I also love how he tenderly sings about queer male love. I am excited for his third album.

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The video for his new single isn't my vibe, though. Rush is a celebration of sex, and the video attempts to capture that imagery. The video is a "sexy" beach party filled with white twinks. As the god of twinks, I expect nothing less from Troye. Of course, there were a few people of color sprinkled in to complete the aesthetic.

At first, I was disappointed by this video. I texted several friends: "Is this video hot or do I need to decolonize more?" The responses were hilarious.

"This video is trash.”

“You like this shit because you grew up around white people!”

“I can't watch this video in city hall!”

“This is hot in a conventional way.”

“Leave Troye alone, artists can't please anybody these days."

Then I asked myself, why do I care? I cared because a party full of white twinks with some POC tokens sprinkled in triggered me. It reminded me of growing up in very white Boulder, Colorado, and typically being seen as unattractive. It reminded me of gay events I was excluded from because I wasn't "conventionally hot."

I digress. As I said earlier, I'm sick of complaining about white gay exclusivity. Lots of white gay men are racist, and lots of them are not. Life must go on. I'll talk about this shit with my therapist.

Instead of bitching about Troye's video, I am going to analyze six of my favorite videos made by queer people of color. Some of these artists are mainstream, some are indie, some are male, some are female. Let's dive in.

Tongue by MNEK

MNEK is a black queer artist from the UK. He released his debut album Language in 2018. My favorite song from this album is Tongue. On Tongue, MNEK sings about the words "I Love You" being on the tip of his tongue. The song is about his hesitation to tell a new lover how he feels. The video captures this tension beautifully.

The camera starts on MNEK. He and some friends are gathered around a long dining table. It appears to be a posh event. MNEK is at the head of the table. On the other end of the table sits his love interest. They stare in a flirtatious way. The onlookers around the table notice the exchange. They whisper back and forth. They exchange curious and coy looks. Will MNEK tell this man how he feels?

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The video then cuts to MNEK in a pink satin outfit. Behind him are his dancers and backup singers. You have to watch to see how it ends.

MNEK chose a black love interest for this video. It's always a coin toss, to see if a black artist will feature a black love interest. Often they don't. His party guests come in all shapes and tones. Is this required for every music video? No. However, it's nice to see imagery that reflects the variety of people in the world.

Often BIPOC artists feature white love interests in their videos. Steve Lacy often has white love interests in his videos. Tyler the Creator has been "kissing white boys for years." Kevin Abstract's partner is white, and his music videos reflect it. The Weeknd, an Ethiopian man, didn't have a black female love interest in a music video until his third album Starboy!

When both black and white queer artists feature white love interests, it sends a strong message. While one's self-esteem should not be dictated by popular media, there is no doubt it has an effect. The uproar around more diverse representation is evidence of this.

If representation doesn't matter, why are people boycotting the Little Mermaid remake? Why does the only Star Trek show with a black female lead have the lowest ratings in Star Trek history? Why are black lead shows like Watchmen and Lovecraft Country canceled after only one season? Representation definitely matters. Anyone who says otherwise, is benefitting from the status quo.

Charcoal Baby by Blood Orange

The video starts with this voiceover from trans activist Janet Mock. The words are from the track "Family," also by Blood Orange. It's fitting because this entire video is about family. We see a split screen of two days involving family. On the left we see what appears to be a biological family, on the right we see a chosen family. The left appears to be a traditional African wedding while the right looks less formal.

Dev Hynes shows us his two sides in split screen. On the left he wears traditional garb and carries an acoustic guitar. On the right he wears a do-rag and carries an electric guitar. Both gatherings have a table of shared food. Both have attendees of all ages. Both take place at The Family Restoration Centre. The sign on the venue says "where everyone feels safe."

This leads us to an often overlooked aspect of sex: safety! This video isn't filled with hot chiseled men, but it shows community gathering in a safe space. It shows the joy that can flourish in a safe space, and that's why I loved it.

Tamagotchi by Omar Apollo

Tamagotchi is a single from Omar Apollo's second studio album. The video is rather tame, but the lyrics are quite spicy indeed. I find most of Omar Apollo's videos safe in regards to visuals of queer love. His aesthetic leans more to young, wild, and free. It's actually more common to see straight people making out in his videos than queer people.

For this reason, people questioned Omar's sexuality. They even accused him of queerbaiting. Then he got on Twitter and politely told the world "I suck dick for real." Lmao. Why can't we get that radical queer sexuality in your videos?

The Tamagotchi video is a series of hangout scenes. We see Omar with his band practicing. We see him smoking a doobie with a love interest. Which is a standout because his love interest is a Latino man. Rarely do we ever see romantic love between two masc-presenting Latino people in the media.

While their scenes are tame, they are also intimate. Intimacy in queer male relationships is rare on screen. There is a tendency to sexualize black and brown bodies. I also think that queer men are more comfortable with sex than intimacy. So we don't demand more nuanced imagery.

Conclusion

That's all for part one. Check back next week for more analysis of queer BIPOC music videos.

"My take is that if a 'writer' is not dedicated enough to write its own articles (90% AI written is ridiculous), I am definitely not going to dedicated to read this article" - Cornelius Magnus

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What Forte saw as optimization, several commenters felt as betrayal. The sentiment: "We follow you for YOUR writing, not AI's."

I have mixed feelings about Forte's video.

I understand how useful this workflow is for an established writer. He trained his Claude project using 20 of his long-form essays. His AI writing builds upon hundreds of hours of his own work. I see no issue with this in principle. Still, I feel uneasy knowing he isn't writing 90% of his words anymore.

As someone new to writing online, I can't follow his workflow. I refuse to build an audience using AI writing. But I'm not innocent; I use AI for research and editing. Where's the line?

Dan Koe's latest video argues AI isn't going anywhere. He says there will be those who direct AI and those who take orders from the people who do. While Koe positions this as empowering, it feels dystopian.

I give AI directions within a framework set by corporations. If my directions clash with corporate whims, AI won't comply. My AI transcription service won't even transcribe notes where I use the n-word.

Nicolas Cole says 50% of his writing is done with AI. He states: "The fastest-growing, highest-earning Digital Writers aren't shying away from AI. They're embracing it. Get on board or get left behind."

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Lacy Phillips, creator of spiritual brand TBM, uses AI for astrological readings. Recently she recommended using AI for the complex branch of astrology called astrocartography. I thought her suggestion was novel.

I tell friends curious about astrology to upload their chart to AI and ask for explanations. But this is support, not active creation.

The question: Will consumers boycott content they feel is mostly AI-written? Will they simply disengage? The most telling comment on Forte's video points toward this future:

"I am really surprised that you're releasing this. What you're essentially doing here is watering down your personal brand… And the 20 pieces of content you're using today to give it 'your style' is only useful today, as the next 20 pieces you 'write' aren't your writing or style, they're AI interpretation of your [writing]" - Darren Hadfield

I agree that telling your followers AI does 90% of your writing hurts Forte's personal brand. While I feel training AI with 20 written pieces is legitimate, this commenter feels it's still not the same as writing your own words.

I fear a future where the outrage won't matter. Despite claims that AI is a bubble, or that AI won't get much better, the ship is full steam ahead.

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People are sick of AI, and the backlash is growing stronger.

Last month, Erykah Badu released an animated video for her new single "Next To You." This official visualizer features Badu's new character Abi hanging with her boo Alan. Simple black and white cartoons act out a teenage love affair. Pretty inoffensive.

Except everyone in the comments is convinced AI created the animations. One user says, "I'm so embarrassed. I showed this to my kid and they recognized it was AI. I admit I wasn't paying enough attention. Now I am."

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Someone else said, "I hope AI doesn't replace your beautiful voice 🥀." My favorite comment was, "We need analog Erykah, not artificial Erykah."

I'm not surprised Erykah Badu would use AI for something minor like this. Her brand is Afro-Futurism. I expect her to experiment with all technology and decide if it serves her aesthetic. Honestly, I think all Black folks should do that. I mention Black people specifically because the AI renaissance is another white-dominated sector.

I am surprised how upset fans are in the comments. I'm especially surprised that this video is what caught one person's attention about the seriousness of AI. Pundits talk about AI all day, every day, but they're worried when Erykah Badu uses it?

Maybe Badu's fans associate her brand less with Afro-Futurism and more with traditional Black values. Either way, as one user puts it, the vibe in the comments is "No AI, No Exceptions."

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This week I'm thinking about rest and its importance. The title is the reminder I need: take a fucking nap. I'm the sort of person who works nonstop and then says "a little more." In my head there's always a payoff, if I can just do more.

Rest Is Resistance

I'm reading Rest is Resistance by Tricia Hersey. Her book came at just the right time. Despite feeling exhausted from work, it still feels like I must do more. What strikes me about this book is the notion that rest is how we take our power back.

Who is "we"? The overworked masses, the 99%, everyone in pursuit of the American dream. In my case, a Black working professional who wants a better life.

Tricia Hersey was in a similar position when she created the Nap Ministry and wrote Rest Is Resistance. "While in a brutally busy graduate program, with financial issues, family illness, and the threat of racial violence always swirling around, I started to experiment with rest."

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Napping sounds lazy. Who has time to nap? But Tricia isn't lazy—it's the opposite, she's busy as fuck. If she's busy as fuck and she thinks it's okay to rest, maybe it's okay for me.

Something else she wrote hit home: "My commitment to rest as a form of resistance...[to] the machine-level pace of our culture and surviving the trauma of the terror of poverty, exhaustion, white supremacy, and capitalism" (pg.3).

I like to be productive. I like the idea of building my dream life. But I have limits. This sentence struck me because sometimes I push myself out of fear. The terror of poverty is real, the terror of white supremacy is real, the terror of capitalism is real. Capitalism has the capacity to create abundance, but it also has the capacity to destroy those who don't fall in line.

I'm still going to work hard. Yet when I'm tired, I'm going to rest. Rest is another way to claim my power. Rest is how I stay in the game long enough to win.

"This book is a testimony and testament of my refusal to donate my body to a system that still owes a debt to my Ancestors for theft of their labor and Dreamspace." - Tricia Hersey

Africans across the globe won't be seeing reparations anytime soon, so I'm going to take a fucking nap.

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“You’re not African.” He said it without a moment's hesitation, next to the office microwave. I was livid. The words hit me like a punch to the gut.

Why would my Mexican say something so mean without a moment's hesitation? I tensely gulped air. “I respect your opinion, but you don't get to decide who I am”

From down the hallway, another coworker shouted “You can't say that”. He backpedals. “We’re American. When I have my kids they will be American” I responded. “You don't stop being who you are because you go to another place” She chimes in again “What are you talking about? it's about culture your children will be Mexican”

I didn't want to write this today. I didn't want to talk about my identity. More accurately, I was scared to write this. The beginning of this story happened a few months ago. The climax happened a few days ago. I don't know where it's going to end, yet.

Cold Samosas

This started during lunch at our construction site break room– our version of the watering hole . Not the water cooler, but the microwave where we gather to warm our food. I was heating up leftover Nepalese food when my coworker pointed at my samosa.

“What is that?”

“It's a samosa. It's like an eggroll but it's filled with potatoes and veggies,” I explained. You find them in Indian cuisine and African cuisine. I could make some and—”

“You’re not African,” He interrupted.

American African

Those words cut like a knife. I don't understand why he responded this way.

I didn't even claim to be African at that moment. And yes, I do believe I am African.

Here’s what I know:

• My ancestors stopped being African when they got to these shores.

• I love and accept the African roots of my black culture.

• For me, Black and African are the same—one is just more specific.

I’m also undeniably American. Born here. Contributed here my entire life. My grandfathers fought in World War II. My grandmother survived the Jim Crow. No one—looking at you, Ron Desantis—can take that identity away.

Being American doesn't erase being African. Generations in a different country does not change DNA or heritage. My culture is the culmination of Africans living in America for generations.

Identity is a personal choice and this is how I chose to identity. Some black Americans identify differently and I understand that as well.

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A Pattern of Erasure

This wasn’t my first time hearing this. A few months earlier, a friend from the continent said something similar over lunch. “African Americans aren't African,” she stated matter-of-factly.

Seeing my face fall, she backpedaled. “Well you aren't African in the same way.”

That hurt worse than my coworker’s words. Her father is from the continent. She was supposed to be an ally, she is supposed to understand. Instead, another door slammed shut.

It hurts but same as with Luis, it's not her choice. I decide what my identity is.

The Citizenship Conversation

The tipping point came during Thai food with my friend Jake. He tells me he is applying for Italian citizenship. His ancestry is mixed European but because he can track relatives back to Italy, he can apply for citizenship.

I get a knot in my throat. It's a familiar feeling. It's the feeling I get when white Americans talk about their heritage. It's a mix of jealousy and sadness because I didn’t know where my family was from.

He then asks “do you know where in Africa your family is from?” I pause and respond. “No I don't know. My last name is Scottish. I could be part Scottish or it could just be slavery”. He chuckles. It's that same awkward laugh I usually hear when I make this comment. It's there to cut the tension. Maybe its white guilt. Maybe it's just the discomfort around discussing slavery.

The DNA Journey

A few weeks later, I bought a Matriclan test from African Ancestry. African Ancestry is a black owned genetics company that traces DNA to African countries. They have access to the largest database of African DNA in the world. This database can pinpoint the ethnic group and current location of a DNA match.

My test arrived on a day I was home sick from work. I did it immediately and returned it to the mailbox that night. The website confirmed they received my samples. Results require 6-8 weeks of processing. Fuck, 6-8 weeks.

I texted Jake, and told about the long wait. He said “ It will be worth the wait”. So I waited and waited.

Six weeks later, I was killing time at an auto shop, waiting for my rental car, when the email arrived. I clicked the link in my email and a letter loads.

“Dear David,

It is with great pleasure that I report your MatriClan™ Test result. We have determined that you share maternal genetic ancestry with the Mende people in Sierra Leone today.”

I buried my face in a Good Housekeeping magazine, fighting back tears. God not here, not now, not the fucking water works. After years of being told I wasn't African, I finally had proof. My maternal line traces to the Mende people of Sierra Leone.

I texted my mom, my sister, my cousin. Then sat with the weight of it. All those years of not knowing. All those people were attempting to decide for me.

Now I know. I’ve always been African. I just needed to find my way back.

Intro

It's a hot night in August. The stadium is awash with bright lights flickering like stars. Abel breaks the silence of the crowd “I’ll always be less than zero!” This is the last song on his After Hours till Dawn show. A million fans are singing along as their wristbands are flickering. This is how you end a stadium show. This is how you show up for your fans.

Last week I told you about the shit show at Coachella. I talked about how disappointed I was in “he who shall not be named”. No, not Voldemort; Frank Ocean. I know it's confusing since they both like playing with wands. Thinking about Frank reminded me of the artists that started the same time as him: Miguel and the Weeknd.

2011 was an interesting time for music, especially for R&B. R&B has a rocky past that peaked in the 90s. Everyone agrees that 90s R&B was stellar. Yet, ever since this golden era of R&B, people keep saying R&B is dead. 2011 started a new era of R&B music. Drake dropped Take Care his lauded sophomore album. Frank Ocean dropped Nostalgia Ultra and started a movement of intimate, hazy R&B music. Miguel released the Art Dealer Chic series, a modern reimagining of R&B pioneered by Prince. The Weeknd released three mixtapes of dark, angry R&B that would be later dubbed the Trilogy. R&B was alive and well in 2011.

2011: The R&B Mixtape Era

This will be part 2 in my series looking at these R&B artists who revived the genre in 2011; starting with the Weeknd. It's 2011, and the musical landscape looks very different. Drake was working on his anticipated sophomore album. Childish Gambino released his first studio album Camp.

Then out of nowhere, something fresh materialized in R&B music. It was a Childish Gambino interview where I first learned about House of Balloons. Childish recounted “I was in a boutique in LA and they were playing this angry R&B."

I heard that interview in April, right after Abel released his first mixtape of 2011. House of Balloons was the first time I heard the Weeknd. Yet, the hype around him had been building for months.

Drake's October's Very Own crew caught the Weeknd early. My guess is because Toronto's R&B scene was pretty small back in 2011. Drake’s manager Oliver posted the Weeknd's first single to the official OVO blog. Drake's cosign gave Abel the extra push he needed. It also started Drake & Abel's tumultuous relationship.

I don’t think Abel needed Drake’s cosign that much because he was hungry. I say that because in 2011 he dropped three mixtapes. Each mixtape in a different season, each mixtape with a different vibe. These mixtapes would later become The Trilogy and be the foundation of his music catalog. To this day, several Weeknd fans say Trilogy is still their favorite project. I disagree but the nostalgia makes sense.

The Trilogy Is Born…

In the spring, we received the House of Balloons mixtape. Late summer/ early fall we received the Thursday mixtape. In December, right in time for Christmas, we received the Echoes of Silence mixtape. Every die hard Weeknd fan knows this but looking back, I took it for granted in 2011.

It's easy for fans to become demanding of the artists they enjoy. We love their music and we want more. In hindsight, I’m grateful because the Weeknd poured out to us without hesitation. And that is the stark contrast between the Weeknd and Frank Ocean. Frank Ocean fans beg for music and receive silence, even disdain. Abel’s fans get regular drops of music.

In those early days, it was hard to see the Weeknd live because he played in small intimate venues. These venues are great for experiencing an artist but they have limited capacity. Abel fixed this on later tours because he played in stadiums. Stadiums allow all his fans to see him at various price ranges. Frank Ocean cannot compete with this because he has only done one full tour. Hence the hysteria around his failed Coachella appearance.

Soundtrack Gems

The Weeknd didn't stop releasing music after the Trilogy album. Since the trilogy, he has released five albums and one ep. Five albums! Frank Ocean's fans are still begging and pining for Frank’s third album. Well it's Frank's fourth album, Apple music subscribers can hear the songs on Endless. There's also the one off songs the Weeknd has done for film and tv soundtracks.

Many of these songs are average but a few of them are amazing. “Earned It” from the 50 Shade of Grey soundtrack is a bona fide classic that expanded Abel’s fan base to an older crowd. This song also showed his range to sing over more paired down instrumental beats. Abel was also on the song Power is Power created for the eighth season of Game of Thrones.

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Power Is Power

While the final season of GoT disappointed, Power is Power did not. The Weeknd takes on the roles of Jon Snow then sings about the upcoming battle with the Night King. Abel captures Jon Snow’s lifelong struggle for justice in his verse.

[Verse 1]

I was born of the ice and snow

With the winter wolves, in the dark, alone

The wildest night, I became the one

And you'll know you're mine when the silence comes

[Chorus]

A knife in my heart

Couldn't slow me down (Couldn't slow me down)

'Cause power is power ('Cause power is power)

My fire never goes out

I rise from my scars

Nothing hurts me now (Nothing hurts me now)

'Cause power is power ('Cause power is power)

Now watch me burn it down

This is the point I want to emphasize: The Weeknd made amazing songs that average fans don't even know about.

This is where it gets controversial. The average Frank fan will say Frank makes better music so he doesn't need to release as much music. The old quality over quantity argument. I wish it applied here.

I admit Frank Ocean makes moving vulnerable music. I admit his music has shaped major moments of my life. The thing is, so has the Weeknd's music. And because Abel remains present he has had a bigger impact.

One Catalogue, Many Eras

The Weeknd has reinvented himself over the course of his five albums. He has taken bold risks and annoyed lots of fans by his changes in sound. His second album Beauty Behind The Madness saw him experiment with top 40 pop. Who doesn't remember "Can't Feel My Face"?

His next album Starboy went deeper into electronic music. Daft Punk produced the lead single for that album. They also produced the final track "I Feel It Coming".

On My Dear Melancholy, he took his music into the territory of industrial techno and synthpop. Unknown French producer Gesaffelstein brought his music back to its darker roots. He also worked with producer DaHeala, from his Kissland project.

After Hours saw him go deeper into synth pop and explore 80s influences even more. His massive hit blinding Lights is so popular because it captures a radio friendly 80s sound. On his most recent album Dawn FM, he made a full dance album.

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Merch Master

It doesn't stop with the music. The Weeknd even does merch better! I have zero Frank Ocean merchandise and there's two reasons. It's always sold out or it's expensive. Frank Ocean likes expensive merch so much that he launched a luxury jewelry brand. “Don't worry guys & gals, I know all my t-shirts are gone, but you can buy a $1,000 dollar tennis bracelet.” Franks jewelry line is so expensive that Drake raps about it on his song Sticky. “Homer hanging on my neck. The bracelet matches the set”. If Drakes raps about it, it's not designed for people in my tax bracket.

Then there was the Blond magazine fiasco. Frank released limited edition magazines with his album Blond. They had articles, art, and commentary. They astonishing for the fans who got them. It was a limited release in major cities like NYC and London. You could buy them online but scalpers dominated that. I spent $100 for one of these magazines and never received it. I guess Frank Ocean has been disappointing me for years.

Here's the thing that several Frank Ocean fans have noticed: he loves exclusivity. Limited runs, limited releases, and exclusive drops. Exclusivity is cool for building hype. But, after being a fan for years, I wish I could buy merchandise without all the hassle.

This isn't a problem for the Weeknd. Abel will take as much money as I want to spend and he has a XXL t-shirt that fits. His team has a higher level of care. The Weeknd does anniversary releases. On the 10th anniversary of the Trilogy album he released a special merch line.

There were items commemorating each mixtape in his original Trilogy. This year he released a merch line for the five year anniversary of My Dear Melancholy. This allows new fans to get in on the action and it respects the nostalgia of longtime fans. Let's say you met your spouse right after the Thursday mixtape came out and it's part of the memory. Someone could buy merch from the anniversary line to honor a personal anniversary. It could be a stretch. Everyone isn't as sentimental as I am. Yet, the option isn't even there for Frank Ocean fans.

Being a Weeknd fan doesn't feel like torture. It doesn't feel like I’m neglected or abused. It feels good to hear music I love. It feels good to be able to see the artist I love live in concert on a regular basis. It's even better that I can afford the Weeknd's merchandise. I’ve never met the Weeknd but our relationship has real lasting potential.

♥️ Thank You

As always, I'm grateful you took the time to read. Send any feedback you have.

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📝PS.

You should start your own newsletter. Youtuber Ali Abdaal inspired me to make the plunge.

Also the fastest way to find your tribe is put out content online.

What strikes me rereading this is how I was already writing about liberation, about finding ourselves in the music, about the exhaustion of existing in spaces that weren't built for us. I just didn't have the language yet. I didn't know about Human Design or energy centers or why that underground dance floor felt like church while office buildings felt like graveyards.

This was written when I was still figuring out why certain concerts left me energized for days while others drained me instantly. Now I know - it's about recognition. That night, in that room, we all recognized each other. No code-switching required.

Here's the original review, untouched. A time capsule from when I was unknowingly documenting my own journey toward energy sovereignty.

Intro

The revolution will not be televised. Gil Scott Heron said those words in the 70s. That fact has compounded in 2023. The world is moving faster and information is being generated at exponential rates. The revolution happens too fast for TV. If you're lucky, you catch it on twitter. 😄

The revolution I'm talking about is the dance music revolution. Small indie acts are making music rivaled the biggest acts due to technology. This is even more pronounced for black independent artists. Long before Beyonce dropped Renaissance black artists have been experimenting with dance music. Today I want to break down my favorite dance maven Kelela.

Kelela

Kelela broke onto the music scene back in 2013 with her mixtape Cut 4 Me. She was captivating for her use of R&B vocals over heavy dance beats. Swedish band Little Dragon ushered in a similar sound, that she surged forward. Spotify recommended her song Bankhead to me in 2013 and I was immediately enthralled.

I bought tickets to see her immediately at U St. Music Hall. DC folks will remember the concert venue underneath the 7/11. Saying that out loud feels surreal, but it was in fact an underground dance club. I descended that long flight of stairs and I experienced pure joy.

She mixed electronic dance music and R&B, who gives a shit David? Ill tell you. Kids like me. Kids who listened to R&B, soul and gospel at home, then went to school and listened to electronic music. Kids whose music tastes bridged two worlds due to context. I'm sure some immigrants can relate. I know out there somewhere there is a Mexican or Taiwanese variant of Kelela.

I was so excited because it was the first time my disparate music tastes collided in the hands of a black artist. An ep came out, then an album, then a remix album. I went to a show on every one of her tours and then she vanished.

It was silence felt across the world. It was the COVID pandemic. All her fans waited with bated breath. We speculated, we longed and we hoped. People would send funny tweets. Where are you girl? People sent thoughtful tweets. "Wherever she is I know she is doing something important and she will return"

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Summer 2022 she broke the silence. She dropped the single Washed Away and posted a funny reel of fans wondering where she was. Next she did a Fader interview and spilled the tea. The pandemic changed her world as much as it did ours.

She cut business ties with those who didn't evolve from the 2020 racial reckoning. She educated herself on white supremacy. She vowed not to do business with anyone who didn't support black liberation. She called out gay men of color who oppress fems of color. This was a new day.

Fast forward to February 2023 and she released her second LP Raven. This album was the same sonic landscape she occupied before but a new mental space. Now her lyrics spoke of liberation for black fems, queer folks and nonbinary folks. The album floored me. Everything I had thought and experienced from 2020-2022 oozed from the music.

The feelings of frustration, isolation, the exhaustion from outpouring of emotional labor. The desire to dance and be free. The urge to make love and connect. The fear of loving another and mustering the courage to do it anyway.

I flew to LA to see the show for RAVEN. Here’s my breakdown.

Tour

The Raven tour was short with only a few stops in America and Europe. Each location has a dance music scene and/or significant black population. She went to New York, Toronto, Atlanta, DC but not Denver. Sorry Denver, I guess your dance scene isn't diverse enough, yet.

Venue

The Fonda Theater in west Hollywood. West Hollywood is a queer neighborhood. The Fonda feels like the LA version of the Ogden: small, intimate, accessible.

Opener

Right at 9 pm the beat drops. We hear Kelela but we don't see her. A velvet blue curtain rises to reveal a DJ in a fishnet top and a chunky silver chain. Some foreplay before the main event. He spun a mixture of dance tracks with familiar vocals. We got several of Kelela's remixes. A version of kiss it better I'd never heard.

Of course SZA made an appearance. When he dropped America Has a Problem by Beyonce everyone lost their shit. Then came a few songs only the gaybies knew. I texted a friend that I felt like a house mother in that crowd. My favorite was a new remix of Better, Kelela's opus on friendship being better after love.

The stage was set; we were here to dance.

Main Show

The DJ disappears, the curtains drop and I'm lost. Most headliners start at 9:30. It's 10 now and Kelela is nowhere around. The girls are getting restless. The late Lucy's are starting to push. Some queens behind start pushing. I hear someone say "She's a burley bitch" Lmao yes gurl shoulder press.

Me and my new concert friends snicker. I guess they should have gotten here earlier. This happens at every show with a floor. It's not even a thing.

Boom a spotlight hits the curtains, they rise and we see a smoky stage. We hear the beat drop. The girls scream. Phones pop into the air and we scan the stage.

Then after we are wet with anticipation she sauntered on stage. She wore a black dress, black knee high boots, and black leather gloves. The clips from other nights show her in various wigs. Tonight, she's rocking a blonde fade.

It's on.

📝Setlist.

Veteran concert goers know that setlists float on the internet. Setlists are like the ending to a movie. Some people prefer the surprise of not viewing them. I prefer anticipation that comes with knowing.

Plus I get lost in the stimulation of concerts, having a sense of what's coming is grounding.

Setlist

1. Washed Away (kidkanevil Remix)

2. Bluff

3. Happy Ending

4. On The Run

6. Contact

7. Go All Night

8. Let It Go

9. Bank Head

10. Waiting

11. Rewind

12. Raven

13. Bruises

14. Sorbet

15. Enough For Love

16. All The Way Down (Encore)

YouTube Playlist

Here is a link to a playlist of the songs she performed so you can take this journey with me.

[link]

🌊Washed Away (kidkanevil remix)

She starts with her return single and album opener. It creeps to a start like the album version. After the first verse, the beat switches and the remix comes in. We are still here to dance!

🧱Bluff

Next we get the tender plea for love everyone remembers. The crowd sings along.

🩰Happy Ending

Single number 2 and the first dance track through and through. The girls went nuts for this one. I didn't like it months ago but it has grown on me some.

🏎️On The Run

My second favorite cut from the album and the sexiest video from this record. The perfect blend of dance and sensuality. She beckons her lover to let their guard down and stop running away.

Here she pauses and greets us. She says the LA show sold out in 2 days. She thanks us for coming. Then a special thank you. A thank you for her days ones.

🥵Contact

My favorite dance cut of all. It's fast, energetic and raw. That's what it brings out of the crowd. The dancing and the close quarters are getting hot. I'm sweating. This tall skinny thing next me rips off her tank top.

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🌌Go All Night

This is a song from her debut mixtape and everyone knows this one. The crowd explodes. Phones are everywhere. People are jumping and shouting lyrics. I’ll admit this song is super singable.

She tells the crowd “The energy is on 12 thousand million trillion. I can’t hear what is in my headphones.”

🎈Let it Go

This is my favorite track from the new album. Most folks here don't know it. I still have a great time. This song is perfect to sing-a-long to and I do exactly that. I try to keep up while she skips and skats over the beat.

🪙Bank Head

Another OG mixtape song that everyone knows well.

🕰️Waitin (Remix)

The only track from her Take Me Apart remix album. This track sees her join forces with queer DJ and beatmaker Kaytranada. The combo is magic.

📼Rewind

A popular song from her Hallucinogen ep. No complaints here.

🕊️Raven

The title track and manifesto of her second album. Here began an epic three song run to close out the show. The lights change and there is an echoing moment of silence. Her face hides in shadow. Here are the lyrics from verse 2 and verse 3 that jump out at me.

[Picture]

[Verse 2]

Took all my labor

Don't tell me that I'm strong

You'll never wake up

Your silence lasts so long

So long

So long

[Verse 3]

The hype will waver

I'm not nobody's pawn

Don't need no favors

It's all good, I've moved on

Moved on

Moved on

🤕Bruises

The transition from Raven to Bruises is immaculate. On Bruises we dance away the pain, and the heaviness in Raven. If there was ever a time to vogue, this song is it.

🍧Sorbet

Sorbet wasn't on the setlist I found online and it was a welcome surprise. Kelela has a knack for composing sexy songs and this will likely be the sexiest song of 2023. When I heard this song starting, I told my neighbor “someone's going to get pregnant.”

🥊Enough For Love

The final note of the album. After all the dancing, all the truth, all the fucking, the album asks a question. "Are you tough enough for love"

🎢Encore (All The Way Down)

After she gets everyone all hot and bothered and she walks off stage. Every artist does this. Singers plan and rehearse encores. The crowd has to show enthusiastic consent for them to get back on stage.

After she hears the cheering, she returns. All The Way Down has the sound of a 90s R&B classic. For this reason it's likely her most recognizable song. This is how you end a show.

🔭Question of The Week

Have you made time art that moves you this month?

♥️Thank You

Thanks for reading this post from my archives.